The Rules of Besties

So once upon a time whilst serving my mission in 台灣 my dear companion and mentor Jon Ware shared with me the rules of besties, something that I had assumed I knew much about, but found that I was terribly terribly wrong. I will now try and share with y'all what he shared with me since it has changed the way that I live my life. Firstly, everyone is allowed 4 best friends, 2 boys and 2 girls. They are referred as thus: boy best friend, best boyfriend, girl best friend, and best girlfriend. Now, you may think, "Danny... that doesn't work. I do not have homosexual tendencies." To which my rebuttal is, "Neither do I, but I am still a keeper of the rules of besties and yet I have a best boyfriend." Let me explain how it all works. Boy Best Friend (bbff): This, like it states, is your bestest friend that is a boy. Best Boyfriend (bbfe): (I'm gonna be completely honest... I don't really remember the rule for this one so I'm gonna kinda rewrite it.) This is your boyfriend. If you are a boy yourself than it is a dude friend that would be your boyfriend if you were a pretty girl. Girl Best Friend (gbff): This is your very bestest friend that is a girl. And finally, Best Girlfriend (bgfe): This would be your girlfriend, and is also technically higher on the totem pole of besties than the rest. (Of course, if you are a girl we would be talking about the best boyfriend position.) It should also be taken into account that when you are married the rules of besties, or RoB for short, is tweaked. After marriage, all of the other besties become dissolved so that you only have one, being your spouse. Another rule is that you cannot change your besties while on a mission or in space due to the time of separation from your besties thus making you unfit to change your state of relationship, but because of this there is an amendment to the rules of besties. It is the reserve best friend. The Reserve Best Friend (rbff): While away on a mission or away in space as an astronaut you may strike up a friendship with a companion (or a monkey in a spacesuit) and you may feel inclined to claim them as your boy best friend (assuming the monkey is a boy), but as stated earlier, this is illegal in the rules of besties. So in this situation you can claim them as your 'reserve best friend' until you come back and are able to make a clear headed decision as to your new list of besties. I feel very proud to have been a helping hand in your education of the rules of besties. I now wish you good luck in your endeavors of figuring out where the peeps in your posse stand.